Errors of family education

All parents raise their children to the best of my skill and understanding of life, rarely thinking about why, in certain situations, post­time so and not otherwise. In every family there are times when the behavior of a loved child puts adults in Tu­peak. And parents from time to time Sauveur­the culprit of the error.

Error first.

A promise not to love

Parents often complain that children are contesting any request. According to them, the offspring are doing it out of spite and to encourage them to common sense is meaningless. The threat here is also not valid. In such cases many people use a kind Kozyr­ing the card: “If you’re not going like I want, I won’t love you”. Od­however, this threat is usually quickly Zaba­is called. Children feel fake. Once cheated, parents can Nadal­th losing the trust of the child — he will perceive them as deceitful people. Ray­neck to say: «I’ll still Liu­to beat, but your behavior does not approve”.

Indifference

“Do what you want, I don’t care”, ” parents often say, tired of the whim of a son or daughter. They do not argue, not looking for arguments that don’t prove anything considered­Ty that there is no need to strain and nervy­chat as my child’s time to learn self­mu to solve their problems and prepare for independent adult life. But ro­parents should show the child that they don’t care what he does. On­chuvstvoval their indifference, he immediate­but will begin to test how it “on­standing”, and the check can be to initially committing bad deeds. The child will wait to the last­Li et for misdemeanor criticism. In a word, for­McNulty circle. Better instead of ostentatious indifference to try to make it work with re­a Bank friendly relations, even if his behavior is not like parents­NML. We can say, for example: “you Know, in this matter I with you completely agree. But I want to help because I love you. At any time when you need my help, you can ask­city I Council”.

Too much rigor

“You have to do what I’m told­La, because I’m at home», — not­rarely say mom in a conversation with re­a Bank.

Children must obey the senior demon­prikolbno — this is the most important prin­DIC in education. Many parents believe­melt that children cannot give concessions, otherwise they will eventually sit on the neck. However, too strict upbringing, OS­novenae on principles that are not always understood­tion to the child, recalls the training. In such cases, the child will bespeco­like to perform in the presence of all parents and to consciously forget about all inhibitions when they’re not around. Persuasion better excessive rigor. If necessary, you can say: “now You will do as I say, and the ve­cherom we’ll talk”.

Children don’t need to indulge

Childhood — a short time, and that it is beautiful, able parents­columns children from many difficulties. So nice to guess and to fulfill every wish of his child. But spoiled children struggle in life. If you keep them under the hood parent­tion of love, it can lead to many­the number of problems. Removing literally every­dy pebble road with the baby, the parents make the child happier. Rather, it often feels as interrupt­power and loneliness. “just Try to do it myself, and if I fail, I will be happy to help», — one of the options is a wise attitude to doche­ri or son.

Imposed role

“My child ” my best friend», — sometimes parents say. For them, the child — the most important thing in life, because he’s intelligent, you can talk to him about everything. He understands them, like a real adult. Yes, kids, sometimes, doing everything to please their parents, because mom and dad for them the most important people in the world. The kids are even ready to dive into the complex world of adults. Unfortunately, with their own challenges remain.

«More money — better train­tion”, ” some parents are convinced. But love cannot be bought by money. In families with low income adults who do not kN­em, do it to a child in need. Parents don’t have the sense of­tain remorse, if you can’t IP­execute any of his desire. Love, La­ska, play together and held toge­STE leisure activities for the child is much more important than the contents of the purse of the parents. Scastle­you do not money, but the realization that he for parents the most.

Napoleonic plans

“My child will play music (tennis, painting), I will not allow him to miss the chance”. The dream of many loving parents, especially those who in childhood was deprived of the opportunity to do ballet, learning to play the piano or to play tennis. Becoming parents, they set out to give children the beam­neck education. They don’t care that the re­benoch this is not very much and wants. These parents are convinced that over time, children will appreciate the efforts of adults.

Unfortunately, this does not happen always. Often a bright future even none at­ed adults breaks on the complete unwillingness of the child to do, such as­Mer, music. He listens to adults, while small, but then. Wishing you­to be torn from the cells of parental love, begins to protest available to it — roughness, leaving home, and even drug use. So­mu when filled day of child­mi and useful activities not necessary for­to be about his desires, leaving time for personal Affairs.

The eighth error.

Too little affection

“a Kiss of tenderness and other not so important for the child”. Some Rodi­teli believe that affection in the children’s age­STE will lead to further problems in his personal life that, in addition to hugs and kisses, there are more necessary and important things. However, remember that children of any age seek affection: it helps them to feel loved, gives confidence in their abilities. Same­wish to snuggle up must come not only from parents but also from the re­a child.

The ninth error.

Your mood

Because of trouble at work, bad relations in the family adults often “you­let pairs” on the child. Many confide­Bered, that there is nothing to worry. To­it suffices then to cuddle the baby or to buy long-promised toy — and everything will be fine.

When adults, being in bad races­spirits, prohibit something child­ku, and the next day, when the mood is up­moose, it’s allowed, he concludes: still, what and how I do, most importantly, ka­some of mom’s mood. However, if ro­parents feel themselves not to alter, it is better to agree in advance with the child: “When I’m in a good mood, you will not be allowed to do whatever you­want. And the poor — try to be condescending to me”.

Too little time

for child’s education

“sorry, I don’t have time­Meaney», — so say your son or daughter some parents, forgetting about­often the truth — gave birth, then have the time for him to find. Otherwise, the child will search for related­ing of the soul among strangers and quickly distance themselves from their parents. Between them will grow wall nepanema­tion, exclusion, and can be, and what­dy. To destroy such a wall can be very difficult. Even if parents day schedule­San by the minute, need night nye­ti at least half an hour (here is more important than quality­), sit at the bedside of the child, talk­speak with him, to recall that, despite the­even though your employment, he can always rely on parental help and support.

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